


It Hurts

by Anonymous



Series: Mcyt fics~ [2]
Category: Minecraft (Video Game), Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Anxiety Attacks, Chapter 3 tags:, Hurt/Comfort, Nightmares, Platonic Cuddling, Temporary Character Death, no beta we die like wilbur soot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-28
Updated: 2021-02-16
Packaged: 2021-03-09 20:14:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,043
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27762070
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/
Summary: Just two boys with trauma comforting each other~Every aspect of this is platonic if anyone says anything weird about it I will personally fight they’re best friends and nothing more
Relationships: No Romantic Relationship(s), Toby Smith | Tubbo & TommyInnit, that’s gross
Series: Mcyt fics~ [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2081346
Comments: 11
Kudos: 276
Collections: Anonymous





	1. Chapter 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This takes place in pogtopia a few weeks after the Manberg festival! 
> 
> CW/TWs: panic/anxiety attacks, crying, some PTSD symptoms 
> 
> If any creators feel uncomfy about this I’ll take it down this is mostly just a vent thing lmao

The rock walls of Pogtopia loomed overhead as Tubbo followed Tommy closely through the narrow halls. Tubbo’s throat felt thick, the scar on his chest throbbed dully. 

He didn’t want this. He knew that it was coming. That he was going to have to face the memories of the festival sometime. But it hurt so much to think about. 

He could feel his breath growing ragged, his fingers gripping at his shirt as the throbbing in his chest got worse. The walls felt like they were closing in on him, suffocating him as he closed his eyes and stopped walking. 

Tommy took a few steps before noticing that he was no longer being followed. He turned around sharply. 

“Tubbo what-” he stopped, seeing his friends pale face and pained expression. “Are you- what’s going on are you okay?” 

Tubbo wanted to respond but he couldn’t find the words. His chest clenched painfully and he forced back a sob, only just realizing that there were tears dripping off his chin and onto the stone floor below him. 

Tubbo felt his knees give out beneath him and suddenly he was sitting on the ground, doubled over with his arms wrapped tightly around his middle. 

“Tubbo!” Tommy was in front of him in an instant, hands hovering near Tubbo’s shoulders anxiously. “What’s going on? What’s wrong?” 

“It hurts,” Tubbo choked out between sobs. Maybe it wasn’t the best choice of words for the situation, but it was the truth, and it was the only thing Tubbo could think to say. 

“Where…” Tubbo shook his head and Tommy huffed in frustration. “Tubbo what hurts? I can’t help you if you don’t tell me.” 

“I- I don’t,” Tubbo shook violently and Tommy gently placed his hands on Tubbos shoulders and rubbed his thumbs in gentle circles. Tubbo visibly relaxed with the touch and Tommy took the invitation to scoot closer, running a hand over Tubbo’s back. 

“Is it your chest? Did the stitches come open?” He murmured softly. 

“No, no it’s not-“ Tubbo hiccuped, sitting up slowly and taking a deep breath. “It just hurts… being here…” 

Tommy nodded gently and moved closer to him, wrapping an arm around Tubbo’s shoulder. Tubbo let another sob escape his mouth and buried his face in Tommy’s chest. 

“I can’t stop thinking about what happened,” Tubbo whispered as Tommy rubbed his back. He hummed softly to let Tubbo know he was listening. “I keep trying to ignore it and- and move on but I feel like I’m suffocating all the time. I’ve felt so claustrophobic recently and I’ve never,” he coughed, dragging in a ragged breath, “I-I’ve never been claustrophobic before but I…” he sniffled, “a-and Technoblade is here and I don’t blame him for what happened but sometimes I can’t even  _ look  _ at him without feeling remembering what he did. I just want things to be normal, Tommy. It hurts so much I just want to have l’manberg and Wilbur and everything back.” 

With that Tubbo broke down again, sobbing painfully into Tommy’s chest. Tommy rubbed soothing circles into his friends back and whispered quiet, comforting words to him, ignoring the tears streaming silently down his own cheeks. 

They sat like that for what felt like hours until Tubbo’s hoarse sobs turned into quiet sniffles and he loosened his grip on Tommy’s shirt. 

“Tubbo,” Tommy murmured softly. 

“Mm?” Tubbo hummed, his voice muffled and rough. 

“Wilbur and Techno will be home soon… why don’t we move to my room, yeah?” 

Tubbo nodded slowly, becoming distantly aware that they were still sitting on the floor in the middle of the hallway. Tommy pulled away from him, keeping his hands tightly around Tubbo’s. He pulled Tubbo gently to his feet and the two walked slowly into Tommy’s small room. 

The room was undecorated, Tommy didn’t have many possessions anymore. There was just a small chest off to one side and an unmade bed in the corner. 

Tommy led Tubbo over to the bed and crawled onto it, patting the spot beside him. Tubbo nodded silently and crawled onto the bed next to his friend, immediately curling into Tommy’s side. Tommy ran his fingers gently through the brunette’s hair. 

“I’m…” Tommy wasn’t exactly sure what to say. He was never one for comforting people but he wanted to help Tubbo as best as he could. “I think that things are gonna get better. And I know that that’s kind of a silly thing to say considering… well everything. But I believe in us. I believe in you.” He poked Tubbo’s side, making the smaller boy squirm with a soft smile. Tommy smiled as well and sighed. 

“Wilbur’s not too far gone,” he said in a more serious tone. Tubbo nodded and moved to lean against Tommy again. “We can still fix this. You know that right?”

“I- I know it’s just… it’s hard…” 

“I know. That’s why we’re in this together! I want you to come tell me if you’re upset so I can help okay? I hate seeing you this upset.” Tommy ran his fingers gently through Tubbo’s hair. Tubbo leaned further into Tommy’s side, hiding his face against his shirt.   
  


“Okay… you too.” Tommy snorted.   


“Okay, Tubbo. Are you sleepy?” Tubbo just nodded in response. 

Tommy sunk down in the bed till they were both lying on their backs. Tubbo was still curled tightly against Tommy’s middle. 

Tommy hummed softly as he felt Tubbo’s breathing finally even out completely as he drifted off. Tommy wasn’t far behind, rolling onto his side to curl his arms protectively around his best friend’s shoulders. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you enjoyed! I might add another chapter to this of Tubbo comforting Tommy at some point I’m not sure yet tho.
> 
> Leave a comment if you liked it!!


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hahaha it’s Tommy’s turn to be sad now 
> 
> This one takes place after L’manberg is rebuilt and before Tommy is exiled.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Same CW/TWs as the last chapter: panic/anxiety attacks, crying, some vague references to PTSD symptoms
> 
> Once again if any CCs involved are uncomfy I’ll take this down! 
> 
> Enjoy!!

Ghostbur hadn’t meant what he said. How could he have? He didn’t remember the weight behind his words. But that didn’t stop it from hurting. 

“This is why Tubbo’s the president and you’re not Tommy.”

He had been laughing when he said it. The two of them had been joking with each other in Ghostbur’s home, gently teasing each other like they used to do when they were kids. Tommy knew that Ghostbur didn’t remember Pogtopia. He didn’t remember his descent into madness that Tommy had been forced to helplessly witness. 

_ Don’t you get it? You’re never gonna be president, Tommy.  _

Tommy shuddered as he ran. The memory of Wilbur’s voice rang through his head. His chest tightened painfully and he gasped for air as he continued running. 

He was outside now, he wasn’t sure when he had exited the sewers but it didn’t matter that much. He was fine, his brain had stopped spinning, he knew that Ghostbur and “alivebur” weren’t the same person. He knew that Ghostbur hadn’t meant to upset him, hadn’t meant to bring up those memories that Tommy would rather leave buried forever. 

Tommy knew that it was fine. He was safe in L’manberg again and Wilbur was gone. But he found himself unable to slow his breathing. He stood outside for a moment in the soft grass above Ghostbur’s home, breathing in ragged, painful breaths, his hand tangled in his shirt in an attempt to clear his airway. 

His mouth tasted like ash and smoke and pressure built behind his eyes. His hands wouldn’t stop shaking as he looked at the ground which had begun to spin below him. He heard faint voices nearby on one of the platforms and turned to look with the small amount of consciousness he had left. 

Tubbo and Quackity were walking up from one of the platforms to the grassy hill where Tommy stood, talking softly with each other. He sucked in another ragged, shaky breath and walked over to them with as much confidence as he could muster. 

Tubbo seemed to know immediately that something was off. He looked at Tommy with concern in his eyes, although his tone remained light as he called out to say hello. Tommy nodded once in response and looked between Tubbo and Quackity. 

“Big Q, c-can I talk to Tubbo f-for a minute?” He asked, his voice surprisingly normal sounding despite the slight stutter. Quackity nodded. 

“Yeah sure I need to go find Fundy anyway,” he murmured, giving Tommy and Tubbo a wave as he walked up the hill towards where Fundy was sitting in front of Phil’s house. Tubbo waved back and then turned back toward Tommy, who’s composure was quickly slipping. 

“What’s going on Tommy?” He asked gently and Tommy shook his head slightly. 

“I don’t- I-I don’t know I’m-“ Tommy’s voice broke and he felt Tubbo gently grab his hands and squeeze them. 

“Let’s go somewhere where we can sit down, okay?” Tubbo murmured and Tommy nodded, allowing Tubbo to take his hand and lead him up the hill behind one of the houses where they wouldn’t be interrupted. “Deep breaths Tommy,” Tubbo murmured as the two sat down next to each other in the shade of the building. 

Tommy slowly followed Tubbo’s breathing and began to feel a bit more lucid. He was still shaking badly and Tubbo was rubbing gentle circles on Tommy’s hands with his thumbs. 

“What happened?” Tubbo asked softly once Tommy’s breathing had reached a normal pace. Tommy shook his head again. 

“I don’t know- I was just talking to Ghostbur and he said something that sounded so much like  _ him _ , Tubbo. I know he didn’t mean to i-it wasn’t even anything bad it just-“ he cut himself off with a choked sob, dropping his head to his chest as tears formed in his eyes. 

“Tommy,” Tubbo murmured gently, tracing his hands up Tommy’s arms until they rested on his shoulders. “It’s okay, just breathe. You have every right to be upset, Tommy. Even if he can’t remember, you’re allowed to be hurt by the things Wilbur did.” 

Tommy’s shoulders shook as tears rolled down his cheeks. Tubbo scooted closer to him and wrapped his arms around his shoulders, pulling Tommy down toward his chest. Tommy followed easily, burying his face against Tubbo’s shoulder as he sobbed. 

“He’s my  _ brother,  _ Tubbo” Tommy sniffled miserably in between sobs. “W-when we were little he used to tell me he’d always be there, that he’d a-always protect me a-and Techno and Phil and- and he said that he’d be there. When he lost it I-I thought I could save him, I tried so hard to fix it, Tubbo, I just wanted things to go back to normal but he just-“ His voice dissolved into sobs again and Tubbo tightened his grip on his shoulders. 

“Tommy none of what happened was your fault. You couldn’t have known what Wilbur was planning. I know you miss him I-I miss him too but he’s still here it’s just- it’s different now you know? And you still have Phil.”  _ And Techno _ , he added silently, but chose not to say it out loud for fear of upsetting Tommy even more. He decided that that was enough talking, and opted to continue hugging him silently, absently swaying back and forth. 

Tubbo rubbed gentle circles on Tommy’s back for several minutes as he slowly calmed down. A figure appeared in Tubbo’s peripheral vision and he looked slowly over. Ghostbur hovered several feet away, nervously picking at the ends of his sweater. 

‘Not right now,’ Tubbo mouthed silently, giving Ghostbur a halfhearted glare, hoping that he would understand. 

Ghostbur nodded once, mouthing a small ‘sorry’ before making his way towards Phil’s house. Tubbo turned fully back towards Tommy, who had stopped crying and was now hugging Tubbo tightly, face still buried in his shoulder. 

“Are you planning on falling asleep there?” Tubbo asked jokingly. Tommy sat up slowly with a chuckle, rubbing his eyes on his sleeve. 

“Sorry,” he mumbled sheepishly. Tubbo shook his head. 

“S’okay, don’t be sorry.” They sat in comfortable silence for a moment as Tommy collected himself, taking a few more deep breaths before finally meeting Tubbo’s eye. Tubbo grinned at him. “Do you want to go get some ice cream? Fundy and Ranboo just opened a shop not far from here.” 

Tommy thought for a minute before nodding and allowing Tubbo to pull him to his feet. 

“Thank you, Tubbo,” Tommy murmured, his voice less shaky than before. 

“Of course, Tommy. You can always ask me for help, you know that.” 

“I know. You too.” 

“Mhm.” 

The two smiled softly at each other, Tommy leaning against Tubbo slightly as they walked across the wooden paths of L’manberg. Tubbo kept his hand tightly in Tommy’s. 

Tommy would face Ghostbur again later, tomorrow maybe. But for now, standing outside the ice cream shop with Ranboo waving at him through the window, he was happy to let Tubbo distract him. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading I hope you enjoyed!! 
> 
> Comments give me big serotonin so feel free to let me know what you think~


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He had dreamed of memories, mostly. Of the Manberg festival and of the final fight against Dream. They were upsetting, sure, they always were, but he had grown used to them.
> 
> SURPRISE CHAPTER 3 POG  
> I wrote this on a whim at 2am last night enjoy!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> CW/TWs: anxiety attacks, crying, violence (not really? But better safe than sorry), temporary character death (it’s in a dream he’s fine)

Tubbo woke up in a cold sweat, images of Dream and Tommy and Technoblade swimming in his vision. He let out a strangled cry that devolved into a quiet sob, sitting up and curling over so his head rested against his knees as he shook. 

He had dreamed of memories, mostly. Of the Manberg festival and of the final fight against Dream. They were upsetting, sure, they always were, but he had grown used to them. The last dream he had, however, hadn’t been a memory.

Dream had cornered him on the mountainside in the savannah. That part was familiar, that part was manageable. He braced himself for the hit that he knew was about to come when suddenly he heard a scream. He looked up, still crouched and prepared for the attack, only to see Tommy standing in front of him, blocking Dream’s sword. He couldn’t see Tommy’s face when he looked back, almost as if it was blurred. The boy dropped to his knees, then fell flat against the ground. 

His last life vanished as his chest slowly stopped rising and falling, all Tubbo could do was scream. 

The dream replayed in his mind over and over and over until Tubbo was heaving from exhaustion and pain, tears still rolling down his cheeks, forming a damp spot on the blanket below him. He scrambled out of his bed, hastily pulling on his coat over his pajamas before stepping out into the snow. 

He had to see Tommy. He had to make sure he was okay. 

He ran as fast as he could in his sleep deprived state, stumbling on every rock and branch in the path, until finally, _finally_ he found himself in the main lands of the Dream SMP. 

Tommy’s house wasn’t too far away but exhaustion was beginning to overtake Tubbo. He slowed his pace as he walked along the prime path up to Tommy’s dirt house, the tree and the bench just visible over the hillside. The cool, fresh air cleared his head a bit and the tears had stopped a while ago. 

As he got closer, Tubbo noticed a figure sitting on the bench. They were hunched over and bouncing their leg anxiously. Tubbo knew it was Tommy before he reached the bench. Walking quietly, Tubbo approached the bench. Tommy’s head shot up violently when he heard the older boy getting closer and Tubbo sighed, instantly knowing that Tommy’s night had gone about the same as Tubbo’s. 

Tommy’s eyes were puffy and red, dried tear tracks streaking his cheeks in the moonlight. Tubbo was worried about him, of course, but the strongest emotion he felt was relief. Relief that Tommy was there, alive and breathing. Tommy stood at the same time Tubbo collapsed. He crumpled to his knees in the soft grass as another wave of sobs clawed its way through his throat. 

Tommy’s arms were around him suddenly, wrapping protectively around his shoulders. Tubbo reached up and clung to his shirt, letting his tears fall into Tommy’s shoulder. Tommy stroked the older boy’s hair lightly, rocking back and forth and humming some old song Wilbur used to sing. 

After Tubbo eventually caught his breath, he began to speak. Slowly, almost too quiet for Tommy to hear but not quite, he told Tommy about his dream. About seeing Tommy lying unmoving in front of him after he sacrificed himself to save Tubbo’s life.

“I’m right here, Tubs,” Tommy said in a choked whisper. “I’m okay, we’re both okay.” He sounded exhausted but continued to hum anyway. 

After a long stretch of silence Tommy began to speak as well. 

“I had a nightmare too,” he murmured. Tubbo squeezed him tightly in response, still not trusting his voice. Tommy continued. “I had died in Logstedshire and I was a ghost. Everyone came to see me and they saw what had happened, w-what Dream had done. S-so they locked him up right then a-and Techno and P-Phil decided they didn’t want to cause anymore pain and so they left L’manberg alone and we had finally _won_ Tubbo.” He choked out a quiet sob and Tubbo gently traced circles on his back with his fingers. “I’m sorry we couldn’t save it. I-if I had tried harder to escape Dream o-or been nicer to Phil and Techno maybe things would have been okay I-”

“Shh, Tommy it’s okay,” Tubbo said softly, cutting off Tommy’s spiral. “What happened was in the past, there’s nothing else we can do about it now.” He thought for a moment, silently running his hands through Tommy’s curls as he cried. “I think it was about time that L’manberg fell for good.” He said softly. It was something they both believed, but neither had ever said out loud. Tommy stiffened slightly before nodding, letting out another choked sob. 

They sat there for a while, holding each other tightly in the soft grass beside the bench, whispering quiet, comforting words to each other. Eventually they fell asleep, warm and safe in the comfort of each other’s arms, both too exhausted to care about the consequences of sleeping outside. 

When morning came, Sam was the one to find them curled around each other at the base of the tree. He smiled softly and gently helped them up, neither of them fully awake. He guided them towards Tommy’s house and into a real bed just as the sun began to peak over the horizon. 

Tommy and Tubbo collapsed onto Tommy’s bed, both asleep again almost immediately. Sam chuckled softly, carefully tucking a blanket around them before quietly exiting the house, leaving the two boys to get some well deserved rest.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading!! This will probably be the last chapter but also that’s what I said last time so like who knows
> 
> I hope you enjoyed! Please comment and let me know what you think ☺️


End file.
